I will admit it can be nerve wracking introducing a new dog to kids or a new baby to current canine residents.
I know I joke a lot about my untrained dogs...but
there is one thing I am very strict on and that is
dominance training. It doesn't matter the size of the dog...I have seen nasty damage done by dachshunds onto adults. I just heard about a
crippling owner attack...and the dog was only 25 lbs!
Our dogs know very well that their food comes from us. I remind jealous dogs that Mama can take away the bone anytime she wants (they even know that I am headed right to the top of the fridge with it) and the dogs are
never allowed to even play bite me.
They must use a toy. I am even stricter with the kids. The dogs are NEVER allowed to stand over or sit on the kids. They are NEVER allowed to come between me and the children, even when we are standing (note: lap cuddles are very different, make certain you watch that lines aren't crossed). (I once had a huge fight with my mother-in-law over this...you can tell we don't talk anymore, too long of a story, maybe someday but that is an epic unto itself...just imagine 15 years of this kind of treatment...
and she started it! Yes, even in my own mind the bickering was
real mature: She claimed it was "cuddling" when her Great Dane mix would squeeze between my 18 month old and me, knocking over the baby, and she allowed the same dog to stand over the baby!!!...grrr...makes me feel like Mama Wolf to this day...grrrr. My kids, who love dogs, were always afraid of those things...they often came home scraped up and bloody from being knocked around.)
To reinforce dominance, and like many parents out there we want the kids to start chores, the
kids often feed the dogs and give them their treats. The kids stand over, walk across, flop on top of...and fall asleep on the dogs. (Again, always keep an eye that no one gets hurt...dogs too!)
A dog's temperament will affect the latitude of the relationship. I know we have been very lucky, even had great rescues that accepted the entry of children into the family well. (We once had a Chow-mix, talking serious luck there if you aren't familiar with chows! She was so wonderful: She was full of arthritis and asleep and there was a full blown toddler wipe out on top of her. She only got up and walked away. But I admit, that was only good fortune...we had them many years before the kids and we worked on and worried over the merger a great deal.) But the fact is I am a firm believer in
temperament testing. I have seen wonderful family pairings result.
Until both are well merged, and large enough to take of themselves, I do recommend using a
play pen to keep babies safe from excited dogs. Follow the rule of keeping the baby higher than the dog, using car seats, swings, bouncy chairs etc. Be careful assuming couches or arm chairs are adequate protection...even from dogs trained not to jump up...they have brain lapses too. I hate to admit it, lots of this
I have learned by experience,
trial and too many errors.
Lastly, never assume. No matter how great the dog, no matter how great the kid.
Dogs are animals. And children...are children. :-)
Some great resources:
If you are in the
Phoenix Area:
Kim Kowalski did a wonderful job helping us with our 75lb Chihuahua. She is a mother too and has great understanding of just wanting a dog with just plain old good manners. She can be reached through:
http://www.animalwelfareaz.org/meet-trainer
If you are in the
Tucson Area:
Nicole Kelly. I have seen what her dogs can do. It is fantastic to watch! She is a wonderful person...and intense when it comes to the dogs. What more could you ask for in a trainer?! She has the character and the substance. She can be reached through:
http://www.sublimek9.com/contact.html
WHAT NOT TO DO. MY HUSBAND IS GREAT FOR THOSE EXAMPLES. THE LITERAL "DOG PILE".
Utah and
online: You have heard me mention
Steve Parsons and
http://familydobes.com/ many times now. I have met his dogs and they are superbly tempered. Enough said. He is a parent as well and has much to say on the subject and some great you-tube videos.
THIS GUY IS AMAZING. HE COMES WITHIN INCHES BUT NEVER TOUCHES THEM.
If in the
Seattle / Tacoma area:
Kathy Sdao. I don't know if enough can be said of Kathy. She and my sister have known each other, worked with each other for years now. It has been so long the story is foggy. I believe they met both doing pro-bono work for a shelter long ago. Later my sister had a rescue with aggression issues that Kathy helped her work with...and was there for her when he passed this year. I had the honor of meeting her personally this spring. She is simply wonderful on all levels. Her professional bio:
http://www.kathysdao.com/kathy-bio.html
GUARDIAN. HE IS ALWAYS WITH THEM.
What to Expect when You're Expecting has a great chapter at the end about merging pets and babies.
SERIOUSLY? TAKING THIS "DRIVER'S SEAT" THING TOO FAR.
CAN YOU FIND THE REAL DOG AND CHILD?
Family Dog. Some criticize this book for being antiquated, but I find it adaptable to many circumstances. It is naive to assume all children and all dogs should be treated in the exact same manner, regardless of temperament or behavior. It is like anything else, make certain the tips followed are appropriate for your situation. He constantly reiterates to not reprimand unnecessarily...and that for parenting too. No matter your opinion of the author, Richard Wolters, I have met many in service dog training who still hold him in reverence for his contributions to that field.
NOW THAT'S A GOOD DOG!
WE'RE DONE WITH PICTURES MOM
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